Lets try this AGAIN

[EDIT: If you saw my previous post you will know that blogger hated me this week. Maybe it was because I posted a long ass post. Maybe it was because blogger is pms'ing. Regardless, I'm trying this again and by trying this again, I mean I am re-typing EVERYTHING because I get html errors whenever I copy and paste. True Story. Here we go.]


Sometimes my posts have a purpose.

Sometimes they are about as all over the place as roadkill thats been run over one too many times. And random, like the example I just chose to give you. Chalk it up to blogging after midnight.

THIS post will be like said roadkill. Colorful and splattered all over the map.

this cracks me up to no end

I should also add that I have been working on this post since Saturday and each time I sit back down to it, it becomes more outdated. [EDIT: even MORE now that I'm reposting this since it didn't work the first time] Chalk that up to the hottest couple in the world giving us (definitely NOT on their terms but thats a whole other can of worms) the moment we have all been waiting for.

THIS

This is why I love making out with taller boys.
The tippy toe arms around neck move.
Truth.

Normally, I do not support invasion of privacy pap pics. Today, imma let it slide. Didn't we all? And honestly, call me crazy but THIS photo
KINDA kills me more than the actual kiss photos. We Robsten shippers/yatchers/whatevers have known for al ong time that these two kiss among other hot as shit things they do together. What I absolutely LOVE about Rob and Kristen's moments in public (or in the view of crazy telescopic camera lens) are the subtle, innocent, familiar, NATURAL, actions. So NATURALLY that protective hand on her shoulder? ------> DEAD.

Now. Onto reasons why my post is like roadkill.

VACAY. I want to talk about it like woah. It was BLISS. Which is why I want to feature some of my favorite moments on here. But that is for another day and another time. Until then?

Preview:

I swear this is RL
And its not Hawaii

And Squishy:

oh hai there

And there is plenty more WOW where those came from.

NEXT

Because I was packing to go on said vacay and because I pretty much don't have a life this summer, I still haven't discussed the Teen Choice Awards.

In short, I did not watch them. I have not watched anything on youtube. I have not seen Rob's acceptance speeches. And I kinda don't feel bad about any of this. I have never had patience for the Teen Choice Awards. Not even when I WAS a teen.

And I did not flip the fuck out because Taylor beat Rob. WHY? Because Rob will win an Oscar a hell of a lot sooner than Taylor ever will. TEEN Choice Awards people. Teens do not recognize a talented actor. They recognize a hormone infused hottie hearthrob. And puppies.

But Rob looked hot hot HOT and while I know 9/10 of you hate Ashley Greene, I happen to LOVE her and I'm glad Rob at least had her to keep him company.

Ashley you are gorgeous.
But Rob is hottest beside Kristen.
That is all.

I suppose Rob had a puppy to keep him company too.

poor Rob.
you were just counting the hours until Montreal.

THEN when I was coming BACK from vacay, the Robsten Gods delivered THESE:

Ummm yes.

First of all, Kristen looks GORGEOUS as MaryLou and I really need to haul ass to Indigo and pick up a copy of On the Road before I start to hate myself. [EDIT: SINCE my first posting that FAILED I bought the book and started reading it today and I am in freaking LOVE with it.]

Second, yes. I bet you couldn't take your eyes off of him.

I don't know what it is about this picture but she just looks so pleasantly calm about the fact that he is beside her. Again, these two are just naturals together.

And then because I didn't die enough as it was when whales were coming out of the water at me during my vacay, I saw this:

UNF

And the whole world was just perfectly right.

NOW. I realize I owed you this LAST Sunday. And then I told you SATURDAY. [Edit: I'm not even going to go there... *fumes*]

Well folks, its MONDAY [Edit: Yup - its def not Monday anymore] and I am finally giving you the Take me to Bliss Fanfic Rec FOR:

I made this shitty banner.
Please don't hate.

I don't know where, when, or how; I just know that fate sent this fic right to my door step and it OWNS me. It is one of those fics that I constantly find myself thinking about ALL the time in day to day life much like Motu once had me randomly blushing and weak in the knees at the mere throught of Fifty.

If you are not reading this, I can only assume you a) have never heard of it until now OR b) don't have enough time in the day.

If you answers a), well, NOW YOU HAVE so GO READ.

If you answered b), you seriously need to reorganize your life to FIND time to read this fic. You know, quit your job, send you kids to camp, tell your boyfriend you need some time apart, whatever is necessary to facilitate the immediate consumption of this fic.

I'm only being HALF serious. You probably shouldn't quit your job
or leave your boyfriend/husband for this. Of course, it would free
up your time now wouldn't it?

In the Education of Professor Cullen, Edward is obviously a professor and while we have already seen Profward in University of Edward Masen, let me assure you that this Profward is NOTHING like Masen. He is night & day different. Similarly, so is the Bella in The Education of Professor Cullen. Seriously, you are in for a MAJOR treat.

Edward is an early thirties prof who is utterly, painfully clueless about sex. He's never please a woman and never gotten a second date with any woman he's slept with. He wears corduroy blazers. He's very conservative. He is the definition of boring.

I like to think in the photo on the right that he's thinking,
"Wait - you are about to do what?!"
Awkward Clueless Edward FTW

Sidenote. When you google image Edward with Glasses you get A LOT of photos from The Bad Mothers Handbook.


If you have not seen this movie, you also need to find time in your life to do so. Rob is alll kinds of amazing.

Where was I?

Enter the 22 year old Bella who's fiesty but lovely, completely liberal, and who is not only capable of annoying him to no end; she's also his total weakness. @She_viking describes Bella's look as "rock chick with just a hint of Goth" and Edward explaisn to Emmett that "it looks like she is celebrating Halloween all year round." She is ridiculously comfortable in her own skin and total sex kitten.

Kristen a sex kitten?
Pfffft.

It isn't until Edward is out on the town with his brother Emmett that he sees Ms. Swan and gives her a ride home after she's been ditched by her friends. She of course invites him in for a coffee and he finds himself saying yes and you will find your trembling hand hitting next Chapter.

It's Bella's seduction of her Edward that makes this story a complete 180 from Masen but it's his innocence and her experience that makes every lemon this story has to offer (and there's A LOT) both hot as shit and tender at the same time. Their relationship is anything but easy. There is the constant worry that they could be discovered but I promise you, 18 chapters in, this story is heavy on the smut & fluffy and easy on the angst. And you will LOVE awkward, dumbstruck Edward as he learns everything there is to know about pleasing a woman and in turn, your heart will warm as you watch him fall harder for Bella as she crumbles in her resolve.

wall sex
ain't nothing like it

I have rec'd this fic to others and they are continuously thanking me for introducing them to Awkward Profward. you will be offering me your first born too once you start reading this fic. I swear.

Now GO READ -> The Education of Proffesor Cullen

Next Fic Rec Coming Your Way? The one that had me SOBBING in my office this week. True Story.

Under the Apple Tree. Your life as you know it will never be the same.

[A/N I cannot say HOW sorry I am that I suck at updating lately. I love all of my followers, those of you who have been around since day one and those of you who have become a familiar face (or name) recently. I love blogging but this summer has royally kicked my ass. I blame it on the weather. If the weather were shitty just a little more frequently, I'd get this blog updated more often. Wait - did I really just curse the nice weather we've had all summer? Uh oh.

Truthfully, once September rolsl around and I am back in the city, I will be posting much more regularly. In the meantime, thank you to all of you who commet & leave love. You are all wonderful. And to my girls who keep me in the know - @JessWink22 @EdwardsChipper @KJN52 @Jayde17 I don't know what I would do without you and I can't remember my life before you were all in it! - C]