Thursday, May 12, 2011

Leaving on a Jet Plane

*note: this was SUPPOSE to go up last evening BUT Blogger was failing. so its posting now and I'm still not speaking to Blogger.

Ok. Because I'm determined as hell to keep this blog updated regularly - I'm averaging 150-200 hits per new blog post, SOMEONE out there is reading this madness - I couldn't possibly leave on vacation - I know, again, right? I get restless in one spot for too long people - without updating.

Except that I'm writing this from 40,396 feet in the air...

SEE! I would not lie to you people.

So clearly I failed to update before leaving but look - when I could be adding to the mere 2hrs of sleep I had last night or reading sultry smutty fanfic, I'm updating.

Why? Because I absolutely, madly love you readers. Unconditionally and Irrevocably...

Too much? Sorry. Here have some funny...

this is so golden - there's no words

You know what else I've really come to love doing on this blog? Rec'ing fanfiction. Which is kind of crazy because while I love doing it; I find it REALLY stressful...

Why? Because often the authors find their way here... Read: I totally beg them to come check it out. And I want to do them proud. I've written my own book that I hope to publish one day (no I'll never put it online, because a) it doesnt have characters named Bella and Edward and b) im just not brave enough.)

Where was I?

Right! Writing a book or better, deliciously addictive fanfiction - either way that shit is your baby. I get it because I've done it. So to all of you incredibly talented authors I've rec'd know this - I did so because you're simply awesome.

Also awesome? Cats that look like E.T.



SO as I fly to Western Canada to visit bestie, her gorgeous six month old baby, and hilarious hubby... Oh and did I mention finally meet and spend what can only be an epic two days with the fabulous Kate (@kate_Suena)? It is the LEAST I can do to share the love with a wicked fanfic for you to all devour...

As I've said on here countless times, I can ALWAYS count on Kate to deliver the goods. She's like a freaking fic whisperer with a direct line to my fic sweet spot... I think I should get her liquored up on margaritas this week and have her agree to doing a guest post... But yes, she has never failed me and as per usual she did GOOD with this rec...

Edward is a 29 year old brewery owner who is going through a nasty divorce....

Bella is a 22 year old pre-vet student just looking for a summer job....

Yeah - you know where this is going.

She might not know much about beer but after his loveable brother and co-owner Emmet hires Bella behind his back, Edward doesn't have much of a choice and soon, his heart doesn't stand a fighting chance...

This fic is anything but ansgty and even in it's brief moments of heartfail, it's a quick recovery. It's fun and light and if you're the outdoorsy type, it's the perfect spring read... With memorial day weekend parties and camping trips, this fic had me ready to fire up the grill or head to the nearest national park. I'm totally not responsible if you go and spend $500 in camping gear after reading this. Seriously. NOT RESPONSIBLE.

I'm also not responsible if you go camping and this happens

And did I mention, as with all the fics I flail about on here - there's really, really great sex. And it's real.


And Bella gets a period which can I just say is actually really refreshing? Sometimes I read fics where Edward and Bella are just screwing like rabbits and my mind wanders.... 'does she ever get her period?' 'maybe Edward doesn't care and the author just doesnt want to mention it for fear of people freaking out.' remember the tampon catastrophe in motu? 'is Bella on a continuous pill and only gets a period four times a year?'


So many times we see people flipping the fuck out because they didn't use a condom so fic writers constantly have to write "and Edward reached for a condom" well you know what @magnolia822? Bella getting her period and not being able to have sex? WIN.

Why? Because it made me all reminiscent of being in that situation when you've just started dating someone and it's THE night he decides to go for it and you have to tell him it's not the most convenient of times... Yeah we've all been there and thinking of those moments led to butterflies fluttering.

And yes, I'm totally ok with the fact that that was probably the randomest and weirdest rant I've ever gone on. The end. If you want random, look at the comment on this video.

a year later - this screencap still kills me

So in conclusion, you owe it to yourself and Genero who died on a toilet (in real life apparently according to YouTube user bnE4lyt) to read this fic. It's 22 chapters plus the epilogue and it's complete; complete perfection.


As always, comments are complete unadulterated bliss for me. Really.

To the 150-200 people who stop by when I update, please say hi! Its rewarding to know you're out there and just like reviews on fanfic make the authors update faster - comments on here make blog posts magically appear more often.

Until next time, from 40,000 feet - much love!

[a/n so I obviously didn't POST this at 40,000 feet because not only am I not allowed to use my iPhone's wicked online capabilities at 40,000 feet - I really don't think it would pickup wifi even if I could. We don't have those cool flights with wifi in Canada. Another reason why you Americans are way cooler. True story. But yeah, I did WRITE this whole post from 40,000 feet in the air on the notepad feature of my iPhone and on several accounts, my hands did cramp up but that's just a sign of dedication.

I will be gone for a week but please stay tuned to my twitter @takemetobliss for crazy adventures over the next week including me spending five days with a six month old baby (I'll either want one after or be glad I'm single), a day spent in the glorious rocky mountains, and as I said before two days with Kate. I will settle for nothing less than shitshow.

And as always, mad love to @tiybor and @j_carroll7 for providing the perfect visuals from their tumblrs. Want to check them out? Find them at This is your brain on Rosbsten and Just Jenn.

To the fabulous @EdwardsChipper - HI and sending my love! I swear that email is coming. xx


Next update? Post-Vacay! - C]


KJ said...

Sweetie girl, I'm so glad and not at all envious (i.e. TOTES envious) that you're leaving on a jetplane to see your bestie but also one of our mutual beloveds: KATE! Please send her love love love from me and one day, one epic glorious day, I'll be able to be in the same place with BOTH of you (I KNOW. My head's exploding at the thought too). Safe Travels, and yes. Strange Brew is lovely. Anything that the luminous and poetic Magnolia822 is worth the read. She will forever own apart of my heart with her words written in the now complete and already legend: A Quiet Fire. Much love to you, darling. Happy Travels! And please please kiss and hug Katie for me, and Katie, hug and kis and dance around with C for me, okay? xx KJ

Kate said...

*freaks out a little* *RUNS INTO WALL* *flails and freaks out some more*

CRYSTAL YOU ARE ALMOST HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Since there aren't enough shouty caps or exclamation points in the world for how I excited I am (plus I want you to still like me when you get here in THREE DAYS, and I've already sent you a shouty text as well), I'll keep it under control at least until the end of this comment.

I love that you wrote this post on a plane. Even if blogger is fail, you most certainly are not. Not only is that dedication, but it's really fitting - as someone who LOVES to travel, like you, I think it's awesome that you penned this one up in the air!

That pic of Rob is so fucking awesome - and now I want to watch Twilight.

You know how I feel about Strange Brew, so I won't go on about it, but it's one of the best fic's I've read in awhile. I want to go to my fave brewery in Jasper now too (it makes me so happy that you know what I'm talking about - canucks FTW!). I still have to finish A Quiet Fire, but like KJ said in her comment, that is also a must read. Also, appropriate pic choices are appropriate - that K pic is exactly how I picture SB Bella, and I adore those B&W Rob outtakes!

Girl, you had me at liqoring me up. Don't tease! Guest posting anything would be such an honour - even though everybody would be all "bring C back NOW." Those margaritas are going to be so. fucking. good. Plus by then I do believe I'll have another fic rec or two for you. ;)

The end of this post is my favourite part, though. BECAUSE I GET TO FINALLY SPEND TIME WITH YOU SO SOON, AND I CANNOT EVEN. Lunch, Tiffany's, Something Borrowed, shopping, Julio's, drunk, Sam, GG AND GG, hugs, photos, memories - it's going to be so fabulous. And in case KJ reads this comment - you will be there with us in spirit the whole time. One day it'll be reality, and there aren't words for how amazming that will be. ily both so very much.

Okay, C, I'll be SEEING YOU SOON!!!


Anonymous said...

Well clearly, you know I'm madly in love with you and would always check the blog! Hahaha, enjoy your vacay and movie date when you get back!