2009 MTV Movie Awards aka If I could Jizz in my Pants, I would have

WARNING: This post will be (1) very picture heavy and (2) contain the words *flails* and EPIC Fail way too many times.

You've been warned!

I was going to wait until tomorrow to do this. You know, get my thoughts organized.

But MTV is re-airing the awards back to back so I'm watching it again and realized, I can totally do this post tonight. If I forget anything, be sure I will mention it tomorrow!

And... here... we go....


(1)

Leighton Meester
You are gorgeous and I love you.
Some might call this dress bold.
I call it freaking amazing.
Besides you're Blair Waldorf.
You could rock a paper bag.
But don't, cause you know....
you're so much prettier than that.

(2)

Rumer Willis
As Always You Are....
EPIC FAIL.

(3)

Vanessa Hudgens
I think you're super hot.
I also think you rocked this dress.
Others might disagree but...
I'm pretty sure at least Zac and I agree.
ALSO.
How much did I laugh when Andy Samberg said,
"Raise your hand if you're boning Zac Efron!"

(4)

Hayden Pannetiere
I loved this dress.
I also loved your thug vulgarness.
Apparently dating a men who's like 12 yrs older
taught you a thing or two!

(5)

Megan Fox
I really don't think you're hot anymore.
You know what else?
EPIC FAIL.

Now onto BEAUTIFUL Twilight people because in case you didn't notice, Twilight DOMINATED this year!

Ashley Green
You already know I love you.
You already know I want to be friends with you fo realz.
What you don't know...
Is that I think you rocked this look.
Now can we go shopping together?

Mr. & Mrs. Cullen
You two are hot.
No wonder you have hot unrelated children.
ps: Esme (Elizabeth Reeser) I love your dress.
Can I have it?

Here's a nominee for Best WTF Moment.
Billy Zane and Catherine Hardwick?
I'm sorry.
I find it weird the fandom of my 13 yr old life (Titanic)
is now colliding with
the fandom of my 25 yr old life (Twilight)

Cam Gigandet
You are the Sex.
Truly.
And you and your baby mama were SO cute together.
It made me go 'awwww' and semi-flail.
Only semi tho because I only full on *flail* for Rob.
Sorry.
You're still really hot tho.

KStew.
I really don't want to have to say this but...
epic fail?
I say it nicely and not in cap locks.
I still love you tho.

*runs away before she thinks inappropriate thoughts*
Taylor looks handsome.
Not the Sex.
Cause ya know, he's 17

And the moments of the show that caused me to squeal and jump around like a small child....

Rob winning Best Breakthrough Male
I love this picture because I love Jonah Hill.

Oh hey there gorgeous.
I love you.
And I love that blue jacket.
*flails*

Best Kiss aka *flailing at its best*

So I pretty much squealed like a monkey in heat
when Rob announced he had to take his gum out for this.
KStew... seriously?
How the hell do you turn away from THAT!

Best Fight.
Two hot men = *flailing*
Rob thanking his stunt double ?
Pretty sure I want to marry you even more now.

ALSO.

I couldn't find pictures for the following highlights but they needed to be mentioned.

- Bruno's ass ending up in Eminems face? Priceless. It pretty much means we can expect Slim Shady's next single to be wishing death upon Sasha Baron Cohen because Eminem can't take a freakin joke.

- Keifer Sutherland, Never in my life have you made me laugh but tonight, not only did you make me laugh, you left me in tears. Good work.

- Zac Efron - buy a comb. I'm sure you can afford one. If not, fingers work? Just look at RPatz.

- Andy Samberg you were fantastic. Seriously. Can we be friends in real life? I think we'd have a lot of fun!

Alright. That is all. Except for you know, the official New Moon trailer. Do yourself a favor and watch it. It's pretty much the most tantalizing thing EVER.