Sunday, February 13, 2011

the Storm is Coming

Alright fanfic addicts - hold on to your Inner Godesses.

They're going to want to come out to play.

In Wednesdays post, where I discussed the holy hotness that is Garrett Hedlund and the absolute perfection that are the first On the Road stills (if you missed it, CLICK) I mentioned that next, I would be discussing the latest fanfiction to pretty much OWN me.

Not surprisingly, since Wednesday and since completing said fic, I devoured another one from start to finish. Look forward to THAT rec by the end of the week. Trust me. I will give no hints, no titles, just that it is HAUNTINGLY BEAUTIFUL...

But right now, I need to basically do everything in my power to rec the shit out of a fanfic that EVERYONE needs to read.

Clipped Wings & Inked Armor

by hunterhuntington

credit to whoever created this banner

*flails*

Yet again, I have the incredible Kate to thank for this. You can find her here -> (@kate_suena) for those interested which really - you should be interested because she's basically amazing.

She pretty much pushed me to read this story and I am SO glad she did. I have really, truly, learned that anything she recommends - I will love. Clipped Wings & Inked Armor (or CWIA as I will now call it) was no exception.

Now many of you have probably read CWIA. It seems to rank amongst the BEST; Master of the Universe, Emancipation Proclamation, Under the Apple Tree, Edward Wallbanger - you know, the ones we all lose our shit over every time they update/updated.

So IF you have already read CWIA - feel free to read my thoughts and enjoy the pretty and then leave me a comment reminding me that I'm an idiot for not reading it sooner.

If you haven't read CWIA - well, hold on tight.

Shall we?

Edward

He's pierced. He's tattooed. He's gorgeous. He's easily aroused (like its kinda of ridiculous and insanely hot). He's inherantly wealthy. He's kind of an asshole and as per usual; it's fuckhawt.

Honestly, I blame fanfiction for my propensity to continuously date and be attracted to assholes.

Edward, along with friends Emmett and Jasper owns a tattoo shop called 'Breaking Dawn'.

See what they did there?

He has screwed his fair share of ladies, knows a thing or two about gang bangs, has done shit he is not proud of and is beyond possessed with guilt surrounding the murder of his parents at the age of seventeen.

Because don't we all love a tormented Edward?
YES.

And as with all fanfiction, he becomes absolutely infatuated with the mysterious, beautiful, tigress of a woman who has just started working at his Aunts BookStore across the street. He is complicated, possessive, and determined to mark his territory. And marking is HOT.


Bella
Bella is a broken, Masters student who has moved to Chicago to pick up the pieces following a plane crash that claimed the lives of her fiancee, family, and friends leaving her, the bride-to-be whose flight to her destination wedding never made it, the sole survivor of the wedding party.

RIGHT?
How in the hell do you pick the pieces up from THAT?

Looking to be painted with a reminder of everything she has lost on her back, she seeks the talent of the devastatingly beautiful tattoo artist Edward across the street from the bookstore she's employed at, in turn igniting a fire that hasn't burned since the fiery crash that claimed everyone she loved.

In case you haven't noticed, I LOVE asshole Edwards. I also LOVE a broken Bella. CWIA delivers a heartbreakingly beautiful broken Bella. I think she might tie with Under the Apple Tree's Bella as the one who broke my heart over and over and over again..... So basically put an Asshole Edward with a Broken Bella and I'm in fanfiction heaven.

Another winning point in Clipped Wings & Inked Armor? The secondary characters.


Esme & Carlisle

I LOVE CWIA's Esme. She is young. She is hip. She delivers cupcakes to a bunch of tattoo & piercing addicts. What is not to love? In CWIA she is Edward's aunt who is married to Carlise. I also happen to LOVE Carlisle in this fic and some of the exchanges he shares with Edward will have you snot sobbing. True Story.


Alice
CWIA Alice is similar to all Alice's in that she's hyper, pixie like, and you want her as your own sister/bestie. In contrast, she's pierced, tattooed, damaged and it would be her pleasure to pierce your nipple or clit. Madly in love with her Jasper, eager to tease and torment Edward by getting her hands and piercing tools on Bella - this particular Alice is by FAR a favorite.


Rosalie
Gorgeous. Strip club waitress. Engineering student. Relentlessly pined after by a determined Emmett. I absolutely LOVED this Rosalie and I'm not going to lie - I'm not usually a huge Rosalie fan. I almost ALWAYS seem to favor Alice but in CWIA I loved them equally. And for once - she's not knocked up.

Throw in the charming, pierced, and tattooed Emmett and Jasper of the story. A stripper Tanya. Shady stripclub owners Aro and Caius and quite possibly the WORST James yet - honestly, has this story won anything for best collaborative characters? Because seriously - SO.MUCH.WIN.

This story will make you LAUGH. This story will make you CRY. Once you start reading it - you will be powerless to stop and powerless to push it from your thoughts. It's certainly angsty and it will stress the hell out of you but it's worth it. You owe it to yourself to EXPERIENCE this story.

As with ANY fanfiction - there are some hazards to your health which I feel I should properly warn you of ahead of time.

1) You will WANT hot, unadulterated sex ALL the time. I'm talking sex against walls, on coffee tables, on Audis, read: EVERYWHERE 24/7 while reading this story.

I kid you not.

You will also want to pounce any good looking tattooed or pierced men who cross your path. Don't believe me? Ask the hot tattoo shop owner who comes by the casino I work at; one look at his sleeve tattoo and I pretty much die.


Please and Thank you

2) You might find yourself wanting a cat. If you already own one, you might find yourself constantly calling it TK2.


That is NOT me
But it might as well should be.

Do I think it was coincidence that TK2 in the story is a Stray, a Orange Female (VERY rare) and a Polydactyl cat? NO. It was total fate I tell you.

Please meet MY
stray, orange female, polydactyl cat Bella
or as I now call her24/7 TK2
no she was not named after Bella Swan.
I swear.


LOBSTER CLAWS I TELL YOU

3) You will want cupcakes ALL THE TIME. ALLLLLLLL THEEEE TIMEEE....

bahaha #win

Since reading CWIA - I have bought cupcake pans, cupcake cups, cupcake ingredients and made two batches of cupcakes. In what - five days? #obsessed.

And guess what? I JUST ate a cupcake.

MOVING ON to the LAST Warning Label.

4) You will WANT a tattoo like yesterday. I don't have a tattoo but I have wanted one for some time. First it was a star on my wrist a la Gisele Bunchden. She said when she moved to NYC she couldn't see the stars at night so she got one on her wrist so that she could always make a wish. LOVE that idea.

she clearly got her wish for Tom Brady.
you can take that as good or bad.

Then I wanted a small heart silhouette - which I actually still want. I also want a bird (a swallow) silhouette. And you see where this is going.....

*ahem*

DON'T say I didn't warn you.

So GO -> Clipped Wings & Inked Armor

READ.
LOVE.
RANT.
comment.tweetme.emailme.


[A/N: KATE - Seriously. One, you NEED to stop rec'ing me amazing fics. Honestly, for shits & giggles rec me a crappy one. Just for once. Just to see what happens..... Two, scratch that. Keep sending the amazing fics you send.

I didn't edit.make.create.photoshop. any of the above photos - except for the one of my cat. Which I got her permission to post OBVIOUSLY. SO credit to whoever made them.

to HunterHuntington - words cannot express how thankful I am you sat down one day and spun this tale. So thank you - today and always.

next post? end of the week. translation? probably the weekend.

As always - thank you thank you thank you for all returning, reading, commenting. To those of you out there who have never commented but come back faithfully - I'd LOVE it if you said hello! Just to know you're there! I don't bite!

xx C
]


6 comments:

ladybug said...

Just so you know, I started to read this on Friday, after reading your post.

Then a lot of shit happened.

I only got about 2 chapters, but I just found out I get an extra day off work tomorrow!

Guess what I'll be doing? Not cleaning my closet, that's for sure!!

Jessie said...

Aww this fanfic that you recommended me last week = makes me want to have more crazy tattoos and ask my dear bf to get a full sleeve. Yes, yes. I have a lil something for tattooed men! I realized since I've met you that I enjoy reading about dark-fucked up Edward. And, may I say: the picture of him with tattoos = *blush* and giggling like a school girl?!
Also, adding a picture of your beauty cat with her massive paws = my heart melt! And a hamster in a cupcake? This is major cuteoverload!
You make me smile :)
P.s. you need to get a tattoo, or a piercing..sriously! No pressure but... if u ever need to go and need a cheer, I'm up for it! (this could influence me for my next one..mmm tattoo. Am I weird that I love that kind of pain?)
XO

elle said...

Such a fabulous review for an amazingly brilliant fic. Reading your review makes me want to go back & read this story again. Like RIGHT NOW! Seriously. You sell it well & reminded me of all the reasons I fell in love with it in the first place! Gah! Tatward owns me.

I'm really looking forward to your next rec! They are always sooooo goood!!!! :)

Your cat is beautiful! I love that you call her TK2, I def called my cat that while submerged in this story, too. :)

DaLebel said...

mmmm.. so I'm a litle behind in the fanfics but I'm also an avid reader so sometimes it's hard to find the time to read and the fics have to wait a little bit. But this one... OMG. Why did I wait?? Being someone w/ 3 tatoos already I though it was safe for me to read this... euh... wrong!! Now I'm trying to find all the good excuses to NOT rush to the ink shop and get marked... lol
Thanks C for these updates they brighten my day!! Glad you made it safely from Hawai!!!

Charlie said...

I started to read this in my 6th period class its pretty good :p i hope to finish it on a later date but i got to go. keep on posting :)

Charlie said...

I started to read this in my 6th period class its pretty good :p i hope to finish it on a later date but i got to go. keep on posting :)